Called To Repentance

We had a wonderful lesson, given by Alicia, in Young Women's on Sunday. I've been thinking a lot about it since. It was nothing I haven't heard before, but sometimes things have a way of just becoming clear when you are in tune with the spirit.

Repentance. I certainly need it in my life. Especially yesterday. I got angry at Isaac. I mean really really really mad. Anger is a scary emotion, at least for me because I really don't get angry that often, or certainly to this magnitude. So when I do get really angry, I'm not quite sure how to handle it. Don't get me wrong, you don't have to call family services on me or anything.

I think I get most angry when I'm really looking forward to something, and something foils my plan. I don't adjust to change in plans very well. Yesterday we had a Halloween party at the church. We were going to tie dye pumpkin shirts, decorate trick or treat bags and decorate cookies. I was looking forward to it, however when we got there Isaac was being a total stinker. He didn't want to put on his costume. He didn't want to talk or play with all the other kids. He had to be holding my hand or sitting on my lap at all times. He pretty much didn't want to be there and kept saying 'I want to go home mommy, i don't want to go to church.'

I wanted to have my adult conversation time. I wanted to see my friends from the other ward that I don't get to see that often. I wanted. I wanted. I wanted. Isaac had other plans, and I didn't want to change my plans. I got angry.

The thing about losing your temper with your kids, is you feel remorse immediately. I felt like such a terrible mother. Why can't I have more patience with my kids?? Isaac knew Mommy wasn't happy, and cried the whole car ride home and for a while once we got home. He got sent to his room for a time out so Mommy could cool off. He ended up falling asleep in his room.

A few hours later I heard him coming down the stairs.

Isaac: "I sorry mommy. You were mad at me at the church."

Mommy: "I know bubs, I'm so sorry. Mommy got mad."

Isaac: "Yeah, Mommy was mad. Daddy didn't let me out of time out."

Mommy : "I love you, mommy is happy now."

Isaac then gives me the biggest smile and hug. Forgive and forget. Children are such wonderful examples of this concept. They are quick to say they're sorry, and then once you apologize they forget it's ever happened and go on loving you.

I feel so blessed that I'm able to have the gift of repentance in my life. We make many mistakes, and the Savior goes on loving us despite our shortcomings. The Savior forgives and he forgets.

Will I never lose my temper again? Sure I will. And with the help of the Savior, I'll be able to repent and start over once more. That is the wonderful thing about repentance.